Hiraeth

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rise and shine

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📖 Personal Participation

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𝒴ea, we come to a new page. To be honest, I have never thought anything about what will happen on this page, of course I don't know because everything has a destiny. destiny? what will happen on this page later is a predetermined fate, just need to pray that everything goes well. to be honest the previous few pages were always painful with events, breakups and such. our hope is definitely the same on this page, everything will go well. Destiny has already been determined so I just have to live it so that I don't weaken myself with this situation, oh my, I always comfort myself like that until I'm so tired of hearing that word echo in my heart. "hopefully it will be better on the next page, hopefully not as bad as the previous page, hopefully there will be a special moment" hope let it be hope, if it is destined with a bad ending on this page, I think you just need to accept it for a self.

𝐈.
Story? about us, we must have been through a lot. I'm sure every day we have a passionate longing in our hearts, but again we hold it in. do you know the consequences? there will come a time when it all explodes and I'm sure by that time our moods will be mixed, and so will I. whether the feeling of happiness or sadness is actually burning in my heart, but besides that I feel very relieved because of the explosion of our feelings, the feelings we hold in have been released.

𝐈𝐈.
For a moment, there was still a lot of confusion embedded and echoing echoes in my head. do i sometimes overconfident feel you like me? Am I too sure that you miss me too? I feel so tired when the longing in my heart is passionate but only one-sided. the fear that the longing only happens to me is increasing every day, just hearing something sometimes I can feel you somehow it can? "Am I in magic? He has no definite feelings for you." a sentence that makes me quite bored to hear it. I'm like bewitched, even though I don't know how you feel. It's clear that the longing in my heart is passionate when remembering our story.

𝐈𝐈𝐈.
You know? in the end I just entertained myself so as not to mislead, I want what I imagined to be a reality. it's not difficult, I just want you to have the same feelings and longing as mine, simple but very complicated.

𝐈𝐕.
And about the ending? from two possible perspectives. the first side is when everything is not as expected then you just have to surrender, if he doesn't want to see your feelings everything will be in vain. you know? for a jerk like him all you hope for when it's just longing and feelings but if he never turns to you, it's all just your illusion. think about it, your feelings are passionate while his feelings are peaceful without any feeling very calm, the best thing to do is just surrender. But do you think if he actually has exactly the same feelings for you? what if he really is or even has more passionate feelings than yours? I don't know what it's like to be the hockey and perfect woman ever no matter how unworthy you are in their eyes, all you know for sure is "I'm perfect in her eyes, more than enough".

𝐕.
All that can be concluded is doubt. it's all about doubt and uncertainty, a sense of wanting to move forward but fearing that reality will disappear and wanting to go back but fearing that reality is real. did you just know that love and love are just endless complications, they say just enjoy it but it feels like love is too painful to enjoy right? not one or two people, many people can feel that, enough.

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𝓔very night, thinking about the ending of the story. what you think about is only a happy ending or a sad ending, it feels like a sad ending isn't really fair with all the struggles, right? but if the ending is happy it's also unfair because we never know what's in that person's heart, does he also feel the same way? reviewing the past, stupid things have been done just to get your attention so that I stand out from the rest. very beautiful to remember, but why did everything turn out to be foreign? strange and foreign until finally a sense of confusion arises. if you say you are not struggling, it is clear that you are struggling. if you say struggling, at that time we just enjoy the plot. you know? our story is that complicated to continue, even to remember it is already this painful?? in our story, it seems that we really need a character who relents in order to maintain the feelings of both parties, being willing is not as easy as words, but at least being willing to give a relieved ending. I'm also confused, why suddenly a sense of awkwardness comes when our eyeballs meet, or even a sense of not wanting to meet? afraid that something sad will happen, even though our story that has no clear ending is already terrible, sometimes it deserves to be laughed at. hope more for the end of our relationship until finally expectations are far compared to 360° with the reality of our story. feelings never hurt, it's our expectations that make them sad.