/r/Showerthoughts


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If you were an alcoholic, but have now been sober for 20 years people act like you are a hero. If you have never drank, then people act like you are a weirdo.

https://redd.it/cr131e


The man who started the tradition of men not planning weddings was a genius

https://redd.it/cqykdd


If all the photoshop, makeup and filters didn’t exist. Everyone’s standards will be lower and everyone will be 10x sexier

https://redd.it/cqxaxe


If it wasn't already used for photography, "Selfie" would also make a great term for masturbation.

https://redd.it/cqwua2


Odds are you didn't get away with your lie, someone just didn't feel like calling your bullshit

https://redd.it/cqv5wq


Selling seashells by the seashore is a fundamentally terrible business idea.

https://redd.it/cqt70f


Whenever you have a good dream reality becomes the nightmare

https://redd.it/cqs4r2


Heavy rain must be a natural disaster for mosquitos. Good for them, those fuckers.

https://redd.it/cqpzli


You've spent hours of your life rubbing a piece of glass.

https://redd.it/cqlj06


Someone somewhere might be silently chuckling to themselves at a comment you made three years ago.

https://redd.it/cqozv0


Your face is a combination of thousands of years worth of other people’s faces.

https://redd.it/cqno8s


Kids with strict parents are more likely to survive horror movies because they know how to listen for footsteps.

https://redd.it/cqgc67


You are someone's reason for choosing a different username

https://redd.it/cqgkaj


You know you’re a grownup when you start thinking of business trips as little all-expenses-paid vacations where you have to work but get to eat out a lot.

https://redd.it/cqhqnb


People who are 31 years old have spent an entire month of their life having birthdays

https://redd.it/cqj143


The teenage mutant ninja turtles have no need to wear their masks. They are giant turtles.

https://redd.it/cqfqfe


We live in a time where its faster to play a game with a complete stranger online than set up a couch co-op game with a friend.

https://redd.it/cqa4le


The “Dee” really distracts you from the fact that Billy Dee Williams is named William Williams.

https://redd.it/cqau2u


Your salary is your company's monthly subscription fee of you.

https://redd.it/cqc6ct


People who steal jokes from others but get a better reaction simply have a much higher charisma stat.

https://redd.it/cq82ht

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