Addiction

Self harm is the addiction,
nobody talks about.

As the voices in my head
get louder and louder,
i ran into my room,
seeking an escape,
grasping the cold metal
blade, running it across
my skin, until a river of
hot red fluid runs down.
And it was the first!

For the second, hesitancy
crawled onto my arm
and fingers
but the bittersweet taste
left on my tongue
blinded me.

By the third, fourth and
fifth time, it
became a close friend
protecting me from
Myself.

But by the tenth, hundredth
and thousandth time,
it turned into a poison
showing its true colour,
moving up to my neck
pricking my flesh;
questioning me if my
existence mattered?