Johanna O'Tea writes,
Solidarity, Compassionā¦. Heart!?
Hi
i remember you, and us
I am practicing not being invisible.
we exist!
iām just saying hi to you all
thinking about all the folks who are self- or otherwise labeled as spoonies and āaddictsā and āmental casesā, and other disabled folks i care about.Ā we are all also caregiversā¦ who i mostly donāt get to talk toā¦. here i am for a sec tho.
how much iām cut off from ppl, bc not driving, bc poverty, bc sleep schedule, bc relational traumas, bc not available to do phone calls, bc geographic distance, bc others too overwhelmed to include me, or it being too complicated, bc rarity of necessary connectivity, bc my time mostly goes to surviving/navigating health care systems (that i shouldnāt be talking to much at all ugh)... bc things have gotten harderā¦ for at least some of us...
i think about the potential for more safetyā¦ & leadership & skills & attunementā¦ in our group bodiesā¦.Ā which do exist tho we may not see ourselves as part of a thingā¦
i think about how hard iāve worked to have meaningful relationships and show up for people, and how i canāt do all of that anymore even if i want to, not in the same wayā¦.
no agenda here really tho
if i knew exactly what to do about it rn, iād be doing that instead
i'm curious how much ppl are struggling, who is succeeding (especially in recovery), if anyone, and whether ppl can be honest about those things to their communities
i ponder:
what ifā¦.
we were able to organize more?Ā as individuals navigating illness/oppression/spiritual challenge, AND-OR as communities navigating that + each otherā¦.
pondering:
i have land accessā¦ itās a huge deal.
I think about sellingā¦. bc iām isolated here 95% of the time and i mainly interact in person with ppl paid to help meā¦ who are largely failing to help me meet ongoing and recovery needs, thru no personal faultā¦Ā i wonāt give up anytime soonā¦. tho i experience (negative/horrible stuff) way too muchā¦.
how am i surviving? sometimes iām not sure.
what is consistently helpful, strengthening, nourishingā¦.
being on the land
herbal brews
caring for critters and plants and my space
having things to tend like occasional tea orders and my gardens
appreciating weather
intuitive public & private media
fucking cancelled podcast
ecstatic dance online weekly
soma yoga practice
samaneri jayasera
me talking with the Mystery
lovely local and highest quality foods and cooking and eating
staying in contact with visions
(sometimes) knowing what recovery is and can be
(sometimes) singing
there's also lots of things like this:
(too much) watching movies
what there isnātā¦ is yāall. i donāt have ppl over, i donāt visit them, i donāt reach outā¦ iām not putting myself out there and thatās for good reasons, but itās also killing me.Ā at lot of the barriers are due to the neural injuries iām living withā¦
iām scared to try for certain things, way more than i ever was.
and iām braver than ever, at the same timeā¦.
Intuitive Invisible does recovery co-mentorship (among other things)ā¦ itās worth exploring how each/any of us could invest in (sustainable) collaborationsā¦.
its wyrd here.
reach out if you want/can
i love you
@johannabotanica on telegram messenger
- plants and garden fun: WildFarmacy on telegram:
https://t.me/+TkJN4bFEt89hZDFh- my art gallery
https://t.me/EverageJoFreshArtGalleyfacebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=pfbid02fjkHTuX6KahVkxzH1ec6D4UytiPPVxgXo4wJWoWrYSutJgQWqinVFTj86zCZqhsYl&id=1395295768t.me/CareMagic/533t.me/LifeSanctuary/73t.me/SanctuaryPeople/81t.me/RadioPublicaIntuitiva/2237t.me/IntuitivePublicRadio/11669
